Am I really that scarred?

[darcydodo]

This morning, as I passed by the playground on my way to campus, I heard a little child calling out a taunt; and my insides just curled up with this sick anguish and pain for the unknown recipient of that jibe. You'd think that after so many years I could look back on elementary school with a laugh, and that does seem usually to work, but evidently when faced with actual as opposed to abstract memories there's nothing doing. *sigh* I guess I'll just have to accept that I'm fucked up.

Comments

[girlwithjournal.livejournal.com]

I'm fucked up with you, then. The smell of paste still makes me slightly nauseous.

Aww

[(Anonymous)]

*Hug*! I get upset too when I see little children doing apparently nasty things. Funnily at the time I never really took it very seriously. And then I comfort myself thinking that I can't really know what the situation is, just from what I can see in the few seconds when I pass a school.

Thankfully the great majority of children turn into human beings eventually.

- R

Re: Aww

[darcydodo]

And yet you were one of the nasty children, from what you've said... actually, you were nasty in different ways. You just hit people. That's much nicer than picking on them. :)

Re: Aww

[(Anonymous)]

I was nasty sometimes and got picked on sometimes *shrug*. Mainly because I was confused, I thought that if older kids picked on me it must be my job to pick on the younger kids. Hitting people was easier to understand though; I never quite got the hang of the whole psychological torture thing.

- R

[(Anonymous)]

I think I'm a bit screwed up too; I tried to give blood today, and the stupid nurse couldn't find a vein. And I suddenly found myself reverting back to my childhood completely unable to cope with failure self. It felt just the way I felt when I first had to get glasses, I cried for days that I'd failed my eye-test, I just don't do failure!

- R